As I write this blog, I am now at the time where I’m on the verge of questioning my trials; trials that may seem to destroy my faith rather than reinforce it. Actually I now lack the energy to do anything productive, lest write a blog. However I just keep on pushing myself because I know, it is God’s way of making me trust him and hold on to His promises.

Have you ever been into a situation that will make you wonder what life can be if you ever got the chance to have a hold of everything? To have the steering wheel in full control with your hands and whatever your heart desires can definitely come true, without anything stopping you, holding and anchoring you down? But, you are there stuck in the middle of nowhere, trying to analyze which way to go, even if there is only one path you see ahead of you. You have nowhere else to go but forward. Even if it means walking blindly in faith and waiting in silence, staggering yourself through seemingly endless hollow nowhere.

It is easy to ask for anything, to pray for everything, to expect for anything because you are a children of God. What if He told you to wait? Will we have ears to listen? The courage to stop wherever we are to take directions from Him? How I wish I can go back to my childhood, where faith is my only basis for believing that everything will be alright. Because, it has never failed me.

Patience is not my strong point. Being impatient makes me question my trust in someone, even God. I always have my way, before I met Him I always believe will work as long as I believe it will be. But, since I met Him, everything has changed. And I know, as time passes by, He makes my heart stronger by keeping me wait. Wait. Wait. Wait.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.

James 1:2-8

This trial has reminded me that God is my parent who loves me and will take care of me. I’m always hard-headed to his voice, to His heeding, to His pleading. I may not understand what I am going through right now, but I know He is preparing me to be like Christ in everything. He makes me trust without humane borders. To anyone who is reading this, I am letting you know that whatever trials you have now, you are not alone. Because God will be always with you. 🙂


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